TOW Rewrite: Finding Musical "Diamonds" in the Slums of Paradise City

Food, running water, and a toilet to go to the bathroom in. These are all things we consider basic necessities and often take for granted. What would life be like without them? The unfortunate reality is that more than 11 million Brazilians live in favelas (slums), and many of them do not have access to such “amenities.” Joao Carlos Martins is trying to change that through music. He recently founded a program at the Paraisopolis Cultural Center that offers intensive weekly music classes. While it offers a new hobby for many, it also opens the doors to a wide array of new job opportunities with considerably higher wages. This is exactly what children of such indigence will need to survive.

As a Brazilian Correspondent for CNN, Shasta Darlington portrays this incredible story with efficacious arrangement. She begins with a very anecdotal and specific approach by detailing the life of Yanca Leite, a teenager who has been influenced by the musical program. By doing this, Darlington easily connects and draws her audience in. She then takes a more general approach by iterating facts of Brazilian poverty from numerous credible sources. This appeals to the audience’s sense of ethos, and it makes the widespread impact that the planned expansion of the program will have intelligible. Concluding with the following quote from Leite creates a full circle ending: "I play with all my heart," she says, breaking down in tears. "If it weren't for music, I'd be a drug addict or a prostitute or out robbing. Because that's the reality here." This creates a very resonating and impactful appeal to pathos. The wealth of important information and factoids presented in the article are not nearly as powerful until the audience is able to individualize their implications.

Darlington uses parallelism to compare the up-and-coming music program in Brazil with a successful predecessor in Africa. She describes the Kliptown Youth Program, which provides support services to youth in the slums of Kliptown, South Africa. This strengthens her argument for the effectiveness of Martins’ program. Logically, if a similar program has proven beneficial to its community, then the Brazilian slums will feel similar positive outcomes. Subtle irony is also displayed when the depressing town is referred to by its nickname of "Paradise City." 

Shasta Darlington created this piece to inform her readers about the humanitarian efforts going on in Paraisopolis, Brazil. In order to do this most effectively, she engaged her readers throughout. This was achieved through her outstanding arrangement, powerful anecdotes, and logical parallelism.